Gone But Not Forgotten
by anotherweasley
Summary: Is someone from L&O's past back? Lennie and Ed are trying to find out.


Gone But Not Forgotten  
By: Olivia  
  
"In the criminal justice system, the People are represented by two separate, but equally important groups: the Police who investigate crime and the District Attorney's who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories."  
  
  
"C'mon, Harry. You told me you'd exercise more with me," said the wife to her husband as they jogged out in the cool October night air.  
  
"Yeah, Kara, but we really shouldn't be out at this time of night," the husband replied breathlessly as they rounded another block.  
  
"Whadda ya want to do? Wait until it's summer time and it's still light outside? If you would just get home from work earlier..."  
  
Bang! Bang! Bang!  
  
Both the husband and wife dropped to the pavement at the sound of gunfire. Suddenly, it was quiet and peaceful as if nothing had happened to break the silence.  
  
That's when they heard someone softly moaning in pain. Harry moved to go to check it out.  
  
"Where are you going?" hissed Kara as she tried to hold him back. It was no use. "The shooter might still be over there."  
  
"We're not going to be those people who witness a crime and do nothing about it," said Harry and he cautiously walked across the street and went around the corner of the apartment complex.  
  
"Witnesses?! We didn't even see anything!"  
  
"Kara, call 9-1-1!" shouted Harry.  
  
Kara came running over to Harry. He was bending over a brunette who was bleeding, but still semi-conscious.  
  
30 Minutes Later:  
  
"So you didn't see any shooter?" questioned Briscoe.  
  
Harry shook his head. "No, we just heard the gun fire while we were out jogging. That lady, is she going to be okay?"  
  
"I hope so," said Lennie. He nodded his thanks to them and headed off to join Ed who was talking to one of the CSU people.  
  
"So what've we got?" Briscoe asked.  
  
"Well there was no robbery attempt. Her watch, jewelry, and cash are all there. CSU is pulling the slugs out of the building. Looks like it was three shots. Hopefully, our shooter dropped the gun some where in the neighborhood. They're canvassing it right now."  
  
"Well, I for one am not going to hold my breath. Who is our vic?"  
  
"According to her Virginia Driver's License, she is one Beatrice Mackenzie," said Green reading from his notepad.  
  
"From out of town. I wondering what she was doing up this far north. How's she doing?"  
  
"The paramedics took her to St. Vincent's hospital. Supposedly it looked worse that it actually was. One bullet grazed her arm. It's not critical and she should be just fine. If we go now, we should be able to get a chance to talk to her before Ms. Mackenzie is released."  
  
Green and Briscoe got into their car as Briscoe said, "Good. At least this story might have a happy ending."  
  
St. Vincent's Hospital  
  
Briscoe and Green followed the doctor down the hospital corridor as he told them Ms. Mackenzie's vitals.  
  
"She's doing just fine. Luckily, the bullet simply grazed her arm. Good thing the shooter wasn't that good."  
  
The three strode into the hospital room where a nurse was checking Ms. Mackenzie's bandage. She was sitting on the edge of the bed while her concerned male companion stood next to her. Upon the Detectives and the doctor entering Ms. Mackenzie looked up at them. Ed continued on into the room whereas Lennie, seeing the woman, stopped suddenly.  
  
Green noticed that Briscoe had stopped at the door.  
  
"Lennie...anything wrong?" he asked confused. But Lennie and the woman continued to stare at one another.  
  
"I'm sorry, do I know you?" asked Mackenzie. She was confused by the way the man was staring at her.  
  
The question seemed to revive Lennie who spoke very softly but still stared hard. "Claire? Claire Kincaid?"  
  
The woman turned to look at her male companion and they exchange quizzical stares. Who was this man and who was Claire they wondered.  
  
That was when Briscoe bolted out of the room. Green apologized to the man and woman. He explained whom he and Lennie were and that he would be right back to ask them some questions regarding the shooting as soon as he checked on his partner.  
  
Ed walked back out into the corridor where he found Lennie sitting outside on a sofa with his hands covering his face. Ed sat down beside him.  
  
"You okay, Lennie."  
  
Lennie looked up at him and gave him a wry smile. "Sorry about that in there. Could have sworn I saw a ghost."  
  
"Something you want to talk about?" Ed was concerned. It wasn't like Lennie to get real emotional. Something was very wrong."  
  
Lennie shook his head. "I'll tell you about it later. Let's go in and question them."  
  
The two walked back into the hospital room. Lennie had never felt so uneasy in all of his life. Just looking at the woman brought back so many memories-good and bad alike. Her dark hair was longer, but the face, the face hadn't changed a bit. Her eyes haunted Lennie. It was those eyes that had turned to him that warm spring day full of compassion and sorrow and had closed forever after that. But it couldn't be her though. Lennie had been there by her side during the fatal car crash. He had been there for her funeral. It didn't get any more real than that. He had to focus. This was a case that had nothing to do with Claire Kincaid. There were questions that had to be answered, but deep inside he had other questions that he wanted answered more than these.  
  
Lennie snapped back just as Ed was asking this Beatrice Mackenzie if she could think of anyone who would want to harm her.   
  
"No, I'm afraid I have no idea who might want to hurt me. I am an ADA down in Richmond, Virginia. Maybe one of the criminals, I've put away.... I just don't know. But I don't think they would have followed me all the way to New York."  
  
An ADA, thought Lennie. This was getting weirder by the moment. And he didn't like weird. "And how long have you been an ADA down in Virginia?"  
  
"Oh, about four years now."  
  
Lennie was doing the math in his head as Ed continued. "And why are you here in New York City?"  
  
"I'm visiting my brother, Kevin, here," said Beatrice indicating the man standing beside her.  
  
"Did anyone else know you were going to be traveling here?"  
  
"Only my brother and my co-workers. But none of them would want to hurt me."  
  
Lennie jumped back in. "What had you been doing before you were an ADA down in Virginia."  
  
"I had just graduated from law school and was taking some time off here."  
  
"Here? You mean in New York City?"  
  
"Yes. I'm sorry but I don't see how any of this has to do with me being shot."  
  
Ed tried to cut Lennie off, but he was on a roll. "Police procedure, ma'am. Have to get the victim's history. Maybe when you were living here previously, you met someone who would want to cause you harm. Could you tell us anything that might have happened when you were here that might shed some light on this situation?"  
  
Beatrice frowned and tried to think. "No, I'm afraid not."  
  
"Detectives, would you mind it we stepped outside for a moment?" said Kevin.  
  
After the three of them had stepped back out into the corridor, Kevin filled in the rest of the details. "My sister was in a car accident when she was living here about four years ago. She was in a coma for a while, but when she regained consciousness, all of her memories of people and places were gone. She remembered functional knowledge, like her law knowledge, but everything else was gone."  
  
Lennie's chest hurt so badly he could barely breath. Lennie wasn't the sort who believed in miracles, but today anything seemed possible. He tried to reign in his hope in case it was dashed to pieces. This was too incredible to be true.  
  
"You and your sister....you two grew up together?" Lennie questioned. Maybe it was true that everybody had his or her twin and that this was Claire's. But Lennie had stopped believing in coincidences for as long as he had been on the force.  
  
"No. Beatrice is actually my stepsister. She's my stepfather's daughter. She lived with her mother. Her mother and father couldn't stand each other. I'm sure you've heard the story a million times. They divorced and she took Beatrice. Beatrice's dad married my mother who already had me from a previous marriage. We hadn't seen her in years not since her mother or her father died. I had moved here to work on Wall Street when my mother called me out of the blue to tell me that Beatrice had been in a car accident. We were listed as her next of kin. She had no one else. Once Beatrice had recovered she decided to get away from here and try a change of scene. She moved close to my Mom in Virginia. They never caught the person who hit her car. Not only that, her apartment was destroyed by a fire that same night. I think the car accident was no accident. Sometimes my sister still has nightmares about what happened. I'm worried that who ever tried to kill her the first time is trying to again. Do you think that she should go home? Do you think it would be safer?"  
  
Before Ed could reply, Lennie cut in. "No, I think she should stick around. This could just be a random incident. Here's my card, in case she thinks of anything else. We'll be in touch."  
  
Kevin thanked him for their time and went back to his sister.  
  
"What was that all about? And who is Claire?" asked Ed as he and Lennie were leaving.  
  
"I'll tell you as soon as we get back to the prescient."  
  
2-7 Precinct  
Lt. Van Buren's Office  
  
"I'm telling you, Lieu, I really think it's her," stated Lennie as he handed Anita the pictures. "I know it sounds crazy, but just look at this picture of her Virginia Driver's license. And here is her picture faxed to us from her law school."  
  
Anita shook her head, "I'll admit Lennie, except for the hair being longer, it does look like Claire and both people look very similar. But you and I both know what happened to Claire."  
  
"Who is Claire?" asked Ed frustrated. He was angered by the fact that he didn't know what was going on.  
  
Anita looked at Lennie who didn't seem to want to offer an explanation so she did it for him. "Claire Kincaid was one of McCoy's ADA's about four years ago. Claire had accidentally run into Lennie after work hours and offered him a ride home. On the way, a drunk driver hit the car killing Claire. This picture looks remarkably like her. She had shorter hair, but other than that, I can' t see any difference."  
  
Ed nodded in understanding. "And you think this woman Beatrice is Claire."  
  
Anita was about to protest that she wasn't positive, when Lennie jumped in. "Just look at the facts, her parents wanted a closed casket. Once she went into the hospital when they tried to save her life, we never saw her again."  
  
"And you think that somehow this other person who looks very similar to Claire, just happened to have a similar car accident, who just happened to also be a lawyer, and that somehow the doctors mixed up the bodies. And that this Beatrice person is actually Claire. She wakes up from a coma without any knowledge of her past, so they tell her she is Beatrice and she believes that's who she is. Now, I don't believe in coincidences, but this one is a tough one to sell."  
  
Lennie couldn't let this one go. He had to know. "But don't you think this warrants further investigation?"   
  
Anita just shook her head and gave up trying to argue with Lennie. The truth was, deep down, she wanted to know just as much as Lennie, but she feared that it would all end badly and just open old wounds. "Assuming this is true, you'd need to investigate the hospital and see if there were two accidents around the same time. You need more proof that this is a very real possibility before we go to any drastic measures."  
  
Ed and Lennie nodded and started to proceeded out the door before Anita called out to Lennie. "I want you to be very careful Lennie. And don't forget that who ever this woman is, there's been an attempt on her life twice now in New York. And whatever you do, I don't want McCoy to get even a whiff of this until we're certain."  
  
Lennie nodded that he understood and closed Anita's door behind him.  
  
As Lennie and Ed got into their car, Lennie handed Ed a folder. Ed looked inside. "Claire Kincaid's case file."  
  
"I thought you might like to look at it since it might have a bearing on our current case."  
  
Ed read the report while Lennie drove. "I'm sorry about Claire's death, Lennie. I'm going to admit that there are questions that beg to be answered in this case, but I don't want you looking for what isn't there. You don't need to redeem yourself here. It wasn't your fault."  
  
"What that report doesn't tell you is that I too was drunk at the time."  
  
Ed shot him a questioning glance. He didn't see the connection.  
  
"I'm a recovering alcoholic and that night I fell of the wagon so to speak. If I hadn't been drunk, she wouldn't have offered me a ride home. She wouldn't have been there when that car hit us."  
  
"Still not your fault. The fault lay with that man who got behind the wheel drunk. There was nothing you could have done."  
  
Lennie remained unconvinced. His head understood that he was not responsible but his heart did not.  
  
"So Kincaid worked with McCoy. Was this before Carmichael?" Ed wanted to find out as much as he could about Claire.  
  
"Before Abbie, there was Jamie Ross, and before Jamie there was Claire. Claire worked for Ben Stone. After Ben left, Claire stayed on as ADA for Jack."  
  
"Jack must have been upset."  
  
"Yeah." Lennie didn't elaborate which made Ed curious but he didn't have time to ask any more questions. They had just pulled into the hospital parking lot.  
  
Shady Grove Hospital  
  
Lennie was getting frustrated with the hospital employee. He needed those records. Time to put on some charm.  
  
"Look, I just want to take a quick look at the records on Beatrice Mackenzie. She was in a car accident about four years ago. We think there might have been foul play involved. Someone tried to kill her last night. We just want to see if anything crucial might help us tie these two attempts."  
  
The lady was torn. She didn't want to disobey hospital policy, but she also wanted to help Beatrice. Finally, she made up her mind.  
  
"Okay. I'm going to put a folder on this top and then go get a cup of coffee. When I come back, I want the file left here and you two no where to be seen."  
  
"Thanks," said Lennie with a smile.  
  
The lady shook her head. She went back into the records room, saw that nobody else was around, left the file on the counter top, and walked away.  
  
"Sometimes, Lennie, you have a real way with women," said Ed teasingly.  
  
"Not always my friend. Just ask my two ex-wives."   
  
Lennie and Ed started glancing at the file jotting down as much info as they could that seemed pertinent.  
  
"Beatrice was admitted on May 16, 1996. That's two days before Claire was admitted here. Look here, Ed, they were rooms 214 and 216. Their rooms were right next to one another. Both were operated on an hour apart."  
  
"Lennie, you are not suggesting...."  
  
"We weren't there. We were out in the waiting room-McCoy, Adam Schiff, the Lieutenant, Claire's parents, and Rey, my partner before you, finally showed up. But we didn't get to see her. I rode with her in the ambulance, but once she went operating room we never saw her again. Someone came out alive from one of those operating rooms and I think it was Claire."  
  
"You can't prove that, Lennie. Even if you find and speak to everyone in those operating rooms or who worked at the hospital at that time, you'll never find out the truth. It was four years ago. If, and I mean if, there was a mix up, no one is going to remember. Let's say they both come out of the operating room. One's dead, the other isn't. They look similar. The one that's alive goes back to the wrong room and the other goes to the morgue. Whoever made the mistake, didn't think at the time they were making a mistake. They won't remember one car accident from the next."  
  
Lennie just looked at Ed straight in the eye. "Then we'll find another way to prove it."  
  
But Ed wasn't buying it. "Look, I know this means a lot to you and therefore it means something to me. But there is a very real woman out there named Beatrice who was shot at. Now maybe it was a random occurrence, but maybe it's not. But we need to focus on her. We can't go chasing ghosts right now."  
  
"Ed, you know I'm not crazy. We are investigating the shooting. We've just got two angles on it and right now they both happen to be going in the same direction. Look at this. They listed the accident as a hit and run. And the brother said that her apartment was destroyed. I still think there might be a connection between this and last night's shooting. Let's go see this Officer Farris who brought her into the hospital."  
  
3-5 Precinct  
  
"When you told me that you were looking into the hit and run of Beatrice Mackenzie, I pulled her file. Here's a copy," said Detective Neil Farris as he handed the case file to Lennie and Ed. Farris was getting into his squad car. He was about to go on duty but he had a few minutes to spare. "Four years seems like an eternity ago. The file jogged my memory. Beatrice Mackenzie was being investigated for some illegal dealings she seem to be having going on with the Maccusi mob family. She had just gotten out of law school. They had no hard evidence and the DA's office was on her back trying to get her to testify. She was stubborn. Said we had no evidence. She was worried that they would kill her if she testified. The DA's office told her they would protect her. She wasn't buying it. But I guess the way it all played out, her fears were justified."  
  
"And of course you never caught who ever it was?" questioned Lennie.  
  
"Nope. It's too much of a coincidence though. It had to be a mob hit, but no one could prove it."  
  
"So why didn't you keep pressuring Ms. Mackenzie to testify after the hit and run? I'm sure she probably wanted protection then?" Ed asked.  
  
Detective Farris looked confused. "I guess you two don't know a lot about the case. Read the report. Beatrice Mackenzie died in that car accident. I'm sorry to cut this short but I'm due in court and you know how pissy those DA's get when their witnesses are late. Good luck on whatever it is you're looking for."   
  
Ed and Lennie watched Detective Farris leave.  
  
"I guess someone forgot to tell him the good news that Beatrice Mackenzie was still alive," said Ed quietly.  
  
"Yeah, we'll the plot thickens," said Lennie looking at the report. He showed the autopsy report to Ed. "I've seen this report before. It's Claire's autopsy report."  
  
Kevin Mackenzie's Apartment  
  
"I wanted to thank you for seeing us, Ms Mackenzie. We just wanted to ask you a few more questions if you're feeling up to it," said Lennie gently. He felt strangely calm about all this. Here he was talking to a woman he thought had been long since dead. He tried to reign himself in, but his hope kept rising to the surface.  
  
"Please, call me Beatrice. And I'm feeling much better. The arm's just fine but I am still a little shaky. I can't imagine who would want to hurt me. Are you having an progress on the case? If there' s anything I can do to help...."   
  
"We think there might be a connection between your hit and run and this latest shooting. Your apartment was also destroyed. Someone seems to want to harm you. Does the name Mancusi mean anything to you?" Ed asked.  
  
"I know that they are a mob family in this area. Do you think they're the ones that want to hurt me? I can't imagine why. I've never had any dealings with them. I wish I could remember my life before the accident, but I'm afraid I can't."  
  
"Is there anything at all you remember before the accident? Thoughts? Fleeting images?" asked Lennie quietly. "There might be something that could help."  
  
Beatrice thought hard. "I began having nightmares after the accident. After all these years, I haven't had one in a long time. They weren't memories though. They had nothing to do with my life beforehand."  
  
This could be the key. Lennie pressed on. "Maybe if you could just tell us what the nightmare's were about."  
  
Beatrice thought for a moment. "Well, there's the car accident of course. I remember bright light, the sound of metal hitting metal, glass breaking. The weird thing is, in my dreams, there was someone in the car with me. But, of course, there wasn't. It was just myself."  
  
Lennie and Ed exchanged looks.  
  
"This passenger, do you remember anything about him or her," asked Ed. Lennie realized he was holding his breath and let it out.  
  
Beatrice looked at Lennie. "It was an older man. You sorta remind me of him...the man in my dreams. But it's all nonsense."  
  
"I don't think it is," Lennie said to her. "Do you have any other impressions about that night?"  
  
Beatrice stood up. "When I first met you, Detective Briscoe, you called me Claire. You think I'm someone else don't you?"  
  
Lennie stood up. "Do you?"  
  
Beatrice smiled sadly. "I love my brother and my stepmother very much. They've seen me though some dark times. When I awoke, I knew nothing of who I was. It took therapy and time to get myself back on my feet literally and figuratively. And here I am. And despite all this, there's always been a part of myself that I felt was missing, like there was this void inside of me. I don't know why I'm tell you all this, but I think you know what I've always felt deep down inside, that there is some other life I needed to get back to. For some reason I feel that I can trust you. Now that I've revealed my hand, what have you got in yours?"   
  
Lennie looked at her. "I think you're Claire Kincaid. One Claire Kincaid and one Beatrice Mackenzie were in car accidents the night of May 16th. Both had operations. We think there was a mix up at the hospital. Claire "died" but Beatrice "lived." Here's a copy of Beatrice's law school photo and here is a picture of Claire Kincaid."  
  
"Claire Kincaid. Claire Kincaid," Beatrice repeated the name over a few times as she looked at the pictures. The resemblance was striking and yet Beatrice could see the difference plain as day. "You were in the car with her weren't you."  
  
"Yes," Lennie said quietly.  
  
Beatrice sat back down across from the Detectives. She hesitatingly reached out and put her hand on top of Lennie's. "I was so worried that something had happened to you."  
  
Lennie put his hand on top of this woman Beatrice, Claire, he hardly knew what to call her. "There's DNA from the crime. You can take a blood test and see if it's true."  
  
Beatrice simply nodded.  
  
O'Malley's Pub  
  
Lennie pulled the car up to the bar. Claire turned to look at Lennie questioning why they were here.  
  
"I thought while we waited for the test results..."  
  
"You'd bring me back to where it all began. See if it would jog any memories," said Claire finishing Lennie's thoughts.  
  
Lennie nodded.  
  
Claire smiled sadly. "Well let's do it."  
  
Both of them got out of the car and proceeded inside the bar. A few patrons looked up at their entrance, but no one paid them any special attention.  
  
"I came in here looking for someone," said Claire hesitatingly.  
  
"Yes," said Lennie encouraging her.  
  
"It wasn't you, but you were there beside the pool table. You were drunk, trying to make a joke. I didn't understand it. Not until later."  
  
Lennie could feel the goose bumps rising on his arms. It was like it was all happening again. If there was ever a time he felt he could recall back a time so perfectly, now was it. It was so vivid. This was his second chance. And he was the kind of man for whom second chances didn't happen.  
  
"I asked you about the man I was looking for. He had left. I had taken my time in getting here. Kept putting it off. I didn't want to face him yet. He must have waited here a long time for me."  
  
Claire tried to gather more thoughts. "Josh, Joe, Jack. His name was Jack."  
  
Lennie could only nod. He could barely breath.  
  
"So I offered you a ride home," said Claire turning to Lennie.  
  
"I'll take you to the spot," Lennie said, his voice cracking slightly.  
  
Lennie and Claire walked out of the bar and got back into the car. He started driving. It was the same path they had taken four years ago.   
  
"Do you remember any thoughts or emotions or anything?" asked Lennie. It had gotten quiet and he didn't like the quiet. The quiet separated him from Claire.  
  
Claire looked out the passenger window. It had begun to rain. She tried not to cry. It was all so overwhelming. The life she had thought was hers for the past four years had all been a lie. She didn't know these new people and yet she did. She didn't know who she was or who she was to these people and yet she did. Despite hardly knowing them at all, she felt an ache in her heart that their absence from her life had caused.  
  
"I...um...I remember we were talking as I was driving. You were telling me about a fight you had had with your daughter. I tried to tell you that your daughter didn't hate you."  
  
Claire's words started tumbling out of her mouth. Everything was rushing back. She couldn't get the words out fast enough. "I was feeling so much that night. I was upset by something."  
  
"We had gone witness the execution that morning," said Lennie quietly.  
  
"I was terribly upset and disillusioned about being a lawyer. I was thinking about leaving, starting a new life without the law."  
  
"Jack seemed upset that night."  
  
"I had had a fight with Jack," said Claire. "I thought I was the only one affected by what we had seen. I had talked to someone, that woman, your Lieutenant. Her words had comforted me. And then I saw you and I realized you were hurt just as much as I was."  
  
"We're here," said Lennie quietly almost wishing to change the subject and yet not.  
  
Claire turned to look at Lennie. He noticed she had been crying.  
  
"All I remember is the bright light, the headlights. There were so bright. There was no time to react or think. All I could feel was the pain. I wanted to cry out, but I couldn't. I can hear you crying and calling out my name, telling me it was going to be okay."  
  
Lennie could feel his own tears welling up inside him. His voice shook. "I'm so sorry, Claire. I've never forgiven myself. If I hadn't fallen off the wagon that night and gotten drunk, you never would have offered me a ride home. I lost you that day and a few months later a drug dealer killed my daughter. It is all my fault. I'm so sorry."  
  
Claire shook her head. "Lennie, it wasn't your fault. I'm so glad you're okay. I could never forgive myself if anything had happened to you. I had nightmares after the accident. I thought there had been someone with me. I thought you had died."  
  
Claire reached forward and wrapped Lennie in a hug. Lennie hugged her back.  
  
"You know it wouldn't be so bad," Claire said.  
  
"If what," asked Lennie.  
  
"If I was your daughter."  
  
Lennie and Claire shared a laugh though their tears.  
  
2-7 Precinct  
Squad Room  
  
Claire and Lennie walked into the squad room. When Ed saw them, he hung up his phone.   
  
"Hi, Beatrice, I mean, Claire," said Ed.  
  
Claire just smiled. "Claire's fine. I don't mean to be rude, but I don't remember you. What happened to Rey?"  
  
Ed looked to Lennie. Lennie answered. "Rey transferred to a desk job at the 3-2. His wife was diagnosed with M.S. She's not doing well. He needed more time to be with her and the girls."  
  
"I'm sorry to hear that," said Claire. So many changes. So much she had missed.  
  
"Well as you probably already know. The results of the DNA test confirm that you are Claire Kincaid," said Ed.  
  
Claire just nodded. This just confirmed what she already knew.  
  
"What's even more amazing is that we actually have the guy who tried to kill you. Name of Tatum. We matched him to a previous killing two days ago in Central Park. The 5-2 got a tip and nabbed him. The slugs that we took from your shooting matched this one. It was a lucky break. He's being taken down to central booking. He thought you were Beatrice Mackenzie and was ordered to finish the job he thought he had done four years ago."  
  
"It seems that you're unstoppable, Claire," said Lennie.  
  
The three of them shared a smile. They looked up when they realized someone was watching them. It was Anita.  
  
"Hello, Counselor," said Anita smiling.  
  
"Hello, Lieutenant," said Claire returning the smile.  
  
Anita gave Claire a big hug. "It's good to have you back in the land of the living."  
  
"It's good to be back. Thank you."  
  
They released each other and they all stood in a small circle looking at one another wondering what to say or do next. After four years, there was so much to say and do and yet no one knew where to begin. Ed was about to say something to break the silence when Jack came rushing into the squad room, brushing past Claire. Anger emanated from him in waves startling all of them.  
  
"What are you doing?!" Jack nearly shouted at them. "I was told that you were looking at Claire's file. I want to know why!"  
  
"Jack," said Claire quietly.  
  
Jack froze and turned around slowly at the sound of her voice. Claire and Jack's eyes locked.  
  
Kevin Mackenzie's Apartment  
  
"I'm sorry I'm not the person we both thought I was."  
  
Kevin looked up at Beatrice or Claire or whatever her name was. He still couldn't believe this. Four years of thinking he had gotten a second chance with his sister and now this.  
  
"Your parents, they seem nice," said Kevin trying to change the subject. After four years of talking to this woman, after being her big brother, he had no idea what to say from to her.  
  
Claire smiled. "Yes they are."  
  
"Mac, he's your stepfather and one of your old law professors?" asked Kevin.  
  
Claire nodded. "Yes. I guess that's where I originally got the idea to be a lawyer. But, we have vastly different opinions on subjects. Made for some interesting dinner table discussions though."  
  
"Knowing you, I'm sure," said Kevin.  
  
Kevin and Claire both laughed.  
  
"At least they've caught Beatrice's killer," said Claire.  
  
Kevin only nodded.  
  
"I'm still the same person," said Claire after a few moments of silence.  
  
"And so am I. I'm still your big brother," said Kevin looking at Claire for confirmation.  
  
Claire smiled and nodded.  
  
EADA Jack McCoy's Office  
  
"I didn't think I'd ever see the day when Adam would leave this office."  
  
Jack and Abbie looked up to the smiling face of Claire. Jack grinned back.  
  
"Neither did we at first," said Jack. "Adam's in Europe, but he said to give you his best. He's going to be flying back in a week and would like to see you. Claire, I'd like to you meet my ADA Abbie Carmichael."  
  
Abbie and Claire shook hands.   
  
"It's a pleasure to meet you. Jack's told me some wonderful things about you," said Abbie with her Texas drawl.  
  
"Thank you," said Claire.  
  
Abbie figuring they would like some time alone, excused herself. "Jack, I'll go look over these reports some more and then get back to you."  
  
Abbie nodded to Claire and left the two of them alone in Jack's office.  
  
"Would you like a seat?" said Jack. Jack and Claire sat down on his sofa near the window. There was a space between them, an awkwardness. They might as well have been states away from one another. Finally, Claire broke the silence.  
  
"How long have you worked with Abbie?" asked Claire feeling Jack out for details least she should say something inappropriate.  
  
"About three years, but were not, uh, romantically involved if that's what you mean," said Jack nervously. He didn't know how to broach this subject. "I've dated a little after, you know, but no one in the office, no one seriously."  
  
"Easy Counselor," said Claire trying to lighten the mood and yet somehow relieved by this news. "I'm not going to subpoena a grand jury to go over the evidence."  
  
Jack smiled trying not to show that he was ill at ease. He needed to know and yet feared her response. "So how about you. Anybody you can't wait to get back to in Richmond?"  
  
Claire shook her head. "No and I've actually been thinking about moving back up here." Claire hesitated. "There are some things I'm hoping to get back to."  
  
Jack nodded in agreement.  
  
"Look, Jack. I don't want this to be awkward for you or for me. I'm sure we've both changed a lot over the past four years. I don't want to rush into anything, but I can't deny that this is who I am. This is where I belong."  
  
Jack looked down at his hands. "When we last spoke, that last day before...you were thinking about leaving the law. I'm sorry I pushed you into staying. If I hadn't pushed you...if I hadn't bothered you all day to come down to the bar..."  
  
Claire put a hand on Jack's arm. He looked up at her. "I don't blame you, Jack. There's no blame here. An accident happened. It's not your fault. It's not anyone's fault. If anyone is to blame, it's that drunk driver that hit Lennie and I. Who, by the way, I here you prosecuted to your professional limit and then some."  
  
Jack nodded at the memory. "The disciplinary committee brought charges against me."  
  
"Well that should be nothing new. You were always nothing if not zealous."  
  
Jack and Claire laughed.  
  
"Jack you never pushed me into anything. I was just lost that day. After watching the execution...you know my feelings about the death penalty. I was disillusioned and having a bad day. I was angry with you for not feeling as bad as I was. I just needed a break. You gave me the day off and I did some soul searching. I learned that somebody needs to be here just trying to put the criminals away one criminal at a time. I may not be in favor of the death penalty, I may not have always made the right decisions, and I may not still have the same high ideals that I had when I graduated from law school, but I wanted to be here with you, with Adam, with Anita, Lennie, and Rey. That's what I was coming down to the bar to tell you. But even if I had decided to leave the DA's office, that didn't mean I wanted to leave you."  
  
Jack rubbed his eyes and tried desperately not to cry. Her words shook him. It had taken a long, painful time to get over her death. And here he was realizing that he really had never gotten over it and that perhaps that didn't matter anymore.  
  
Claire put her hand comfortingly on Jack's arm. Jack looked up at Claire. Their eyes locked. He had missed those eyes. "I want to come back to the DA's office, but not here, not homicide. I would never ask Ms. Carmichael to leave. And with everybody knowing about our past...and I just think we need some time."  
  
Jack nodded in agreement. "We can take things slowly. Get to know each other again."  
  
Claire nodded smiling. Her nervousness was slowly disappearing. "I would like you back in my life in some way."  
  
Jack returned her smile.  
  
Claire stood up and held out her hand to Jack. "Well, Lennie is gathering up a little welcome back party in my honor and I thought you'd like to join us."  
  
Jack slid his hand back into hers. It felt so good. Jack realized he hadn't felt this good in a long, long time. "I'd be delighted. And who might I'd ask is going to be at this little gathering?"  
  
Claire smiled. "We'll Anita, Lennie, and Ed. Lennie also said Mike and Rey would be there. Why don't you ask your boss if she would like to join us? And Ms. Carmichael too? If I remember you correctly, you were quite the slave driver. I'm sure your ADA could uses some R and R."  
  
"Justice doesn't sleep and therefore we cannot."  
  
Jack and Claire shared a laugh. Then they just looked at each other as if they hadn't seen each other in four years. Finally, Claire broke the moment.   
  
"Come on. They're probably waiting for us."  
  
And with that they two walked out of McCoy's office to join the others.   
******************************************************************************  
  
"I have come back to where I belong; not an enchanted place, but the walls are strong."-Dorothy H. Rath  
  
"You walked into my house last night/I couldn't help but notice a light that was long gone still burning strong/You were sitting your fingers like fuses your eyes were cinnamon/You said you'd stand for every known abuse that was ever threatened to anyone but you/Why should I know better by now when I'm old enough not too...And I lost the line between right and wrong/I just want to find a place where I belong."-Beth Orton-"Stolen Cars" 


End file.
